Gunbuster (1992)

Name:Gunbuster AKA Operation Gunbuster
Number:230
Year:1992
Publisher:Taito
Developer:Taito
Genre:FPS
Difficulty:2/5
Time:2 hours 30 minutes
Won:Yes (100W/73L)

An arcade FPS. Not as a metaphor. A FPS on arcade hardware, that plays like one of those computer FPS. Made in Japan even. That's such a winning combination that I assumed going in that there was something wrong with the game. You have this game that does all these important things that anyone should be waving around games media. This isn't the usual ugly things I champion, this is just as attractive as the big boys, yet possibly more advanced. What gives?

Also, I have to point this out, this has nothing to do with the Gunbuster anime. People in Japan just liked naming things Gunbuster. The anime seems to be a space opera, while this is more of a cyberpunk thing. I haven't watched the Gunbuster anime, so I could be mistaken. It'd hardly be the first game to be a weird adaptation.

If you move the cursor too far to the right or left, you get to see the heatmap, then skeleton of the characters. I don't understand the purpose of it.

Once you put your quarters in, you can select one of four characters. Everything seems to be the same for gameplay purposes except the special weapons. We've got four, Mine, Flame, Laser and Spread. Mine is an explosive attack and has the shortest recharge time. Flame also explodes, but leaves fire behind and has a mid-recharge time. Laser shoots through enemies and has the longest recharge time. Spread is basically a shotgun blast. I lean towards Mine and Laser. Mine you can simply pump out fast enough to make up for its lower damage; Laser deals a lot of damage and deals with pesky enemies in front of the boss. Spread is basically unnecessarily in comparison to the others and I didn't see anything Flame had over Mine.
 

Putting "warm up" in quotations makes it sound a lot worse than it probably is supposed to sound.

Before each mission, you get a briefing from a creepy-looking databroker of some sort. He tells you what's about to happen on the stage, though his presence is hardly necessary. The intro text you get during the attract mode informs us that cyborg criminals are ruining the city, so bounties have been offered on them. The player is a bounty hunter.

How polite of an arcade game.

The first stage is simple, get used to the controls while a flying monster rotates around an elevator into nothing you're on. No, seriously, the game is seriously focused on letting you get used to its bizarre controls, which are on original hardware, a joystick and a light gun. Emulated, this is WASD and a mouse. This isn't quite true mouse aiming, but it's close. The light gun controls a cursor, reach the edge and you turn.

Oddly, it's this subtle shift in control that feels off. Most of the other arrow movement with cursor aiming kind of games come off as more smooth experiences. Something about this one seems odder than the more odd titles. I'm going to attribute this to being just close enough to what the usual method is that my brain stops trying to parse it as something different and my desire for a standard modern FPS kicks in. I also noticed that turning is very slow, which may have something to do with my issue. I'm also really not sure how two players was supposed to work out, only one gets control of walking, but turning seems like it could be tricky.

Back to the boss, he shoots flying rockets that you can shoot down, and occasionally pops out a drone you can also shoot down. He is the opposite of complex; If this is new to you he's easy, if you aren't he's a joke. Taito really wasn't screwing around with making this easy for players.

And then we have the second stage. This guy's on a hoverbike, not that you would know it by the way he stays in place waiting for you to catch up. Everyone is actually flying, including the player characters. I don't know why. This level seems designed to help you get used to movement...which is kind of helpful knowing that the game is a bit weird. The boss has one trick up his sleeve though, he drops a set of four mines which you will hit if you don't shoot all four.

I suppose that's one way to put it...

The third stage has a boss which shoots projectiles that you can't shoot, instead, you have to dodge. He just goes around in a figure 8 pattern. There's also a person hiding in the corner and another person who if you get close to, attacks you. Basically just a random jump scare for no apparent reason. There's no explanation for it, they pop up here and in one of the variations on stage four.

It's at this point that the game feels weird. You get a choice of two targets, one cheaper than the other, and usually weaker. This continues on until the final stage. I'm not entirely sure why considering that a complete game of this feels incredibly short. I'm through about a third of the stages of one game, even if the later ones are longer. The difficulty hasn't spiked yet, the closest thing to a problem has been that you can't heal, your health only comes back if you die and put another quarter in.

On each level where minor enemies pop up, there are doors that they come out of, so you're never truly out of them.

I'm going to just mention those that I found interesting. Either way you go off the start, you're going to end up fighting mostly the same boss which now is surrounded by a bunch of little tanks and the occasion other flying dude. This is basically the archetype it settles in for the rest of the game.

The next interesting level is a hoverbike gang. This feels like more effort was put in even if it's basically just a rail shooter stage. You automatically move around in a circle, sometimes in front of the boss, sometimes behind him. In general, you're trying to dodge him and the minor gang members. It sounds simple, but it works a lot better than some of the other stages. Even though I basically demonstrated why I don't like rail shooters...burned up the most coins outside of the final stage.

One stage has two fellow Busters who apparently went all psycho killer and killed someone they shouldn't. Or did they? Since if you shoot them enough they turn into robots. Or are all the Busters cyborgs and nobody knows who is going to kill next? Food for thought. It's actually odd, because outside of them looking like two of your possible characters, they're not that interesting. Other bosses use your special attacks, so that doesn't make them special.

One of the final possible bounties is a guy attacking a cruise ship. At first this is a quite simple level, except that the guy goes under the water occasionally, until he spawns two snake robots. These are annoying, they have hard to dodge shots and fly around in and out of the water. I feel like while I understand most of the rest of the enemies attack patterns, even if I can't avoid them, these feel like you need to work miracles to avoid.

The final stage decides that the best way to make itself harder is to have four bosses. The first you kind of fight two at a time, but in practice they were easily isolated from each other. Owing to the level being designed in such a way that there are sliding walls that divide one boss away from you. Gun one down, then take out the other. Once you do this a third boss pops up, and then random enemies start popping in. You can mitigate this a little by shooting some of the targets around the start, because those are unactivated versions. The boss is basically impossible to dodge...unless you aren't in front of him. I'm not quite sure what his pattern is. Once you take out the third boss, you have to flee the stage to...an elevator downstairs.

Then the game goes weird and the true final boss is a brain in a jar. A jar that shoots out lasers. This guy is a real pain, even after getting used to the rest of it I'm still trying to get past him without putting in a couple of quarters. He stands still at first, shooting out a pattern of laser beams. First, two at your sides, then one towards you. Later on he adds another towards you afterwards. About the same time he starts running after you. And don't think you can dodge them by hiding behind a pillar, there are more cyborgs around and he can shoot over the blocks. There was a process where I was mentally like, oh wow, creepy, then just ignored it. I think I should be acting like this is impressive now, but it just feels like a cool little trick.

Kill him, the place catches on fire and then starts exploding. You automatically start flying away, seeing your guy fly away from the explosions.

And I win. You get a win screen depending on the character. The first time, with the Mine dude, he gives an end speech about how he drinks. Damn, that's hardcore. Takes some balls to end your mindless arcade shooter with something akin to "life sucks and then you die". Others include "I enjoy killing cyborgs", "My revenge is pointless." and "I'm glad to get back to my girlfriend now."

I'm going to repeat a point I made earlier. Every level is basically just you going around in a circle shooting at the boss and his underlings...outside of the first which is the boss going around in a circle and you shooting at him. This connects into an interesting design choice. There's an invisible fog of about 4/5 tiles, can't tell which. If the boss is outside of your vision the game will outright tell you in which direction he's in. It might sound like hand-holding, but you don't really have a chance of finding him otherwise.

While this game is never going to win any awards for graphics, I do like the scope of destruction effects it has. Not just your usual scenery objects, but on enemies themselves. As they get torn apart by your shots, they gradually reveal more of their cyborg skeleton. Sometimes limbs get shot off, which affects their damage output...not always in your favor. Oh, and there was a timer which I guess kills you if it runs out. I never remember it running out.

As I close this out, a thought occurs to me. Three out of the four main characters have an ending that shows as much dissatisfaction with the establishment as with the antagonists. If you believe the level where we fight the crazy Gunbusters, they're cyborgs too. The guy who gives us our contracts is a creepy guy who is hooked into some weird machine. This game might not be treating it's story with much focus, but even so, it does feel like it's asking if what we're doing is truly for the good of the city.

With that, let's get to the rating.

Weapons:
Because you get two weapons per character, the game feels limiting in the moment. It doesn't play out like Hexen, it plays out like a flight sim. And because there are no specific targets like there would be in a flight sim, some weapons are of less utility than others. 2/10

Enemies:
On one hand, there are a number of interesting enemies, on the other, there is a lot of fodder. Sort of balances it all out. 4/10

Non-Enemies:
None.

Levels:
Every level is basically the same and the only real difference is the occasional gimmick fight or switch between rooms. 2/10

Player Agency:
Even in contrast to most early mouse aim games, this is awkward. Because this technically isn't mouse aiming, but a light gun and a joystick. Except that this game uses a specific light gun, there's a second button on the trigger which uses the secondary. Outside of original hardware, you're never seeing that, so awkward mouse aiming it shall likely remain for us who don't have the money and space for a 30-year-old arcade cabinet. 7/10

Interactivity:
There are plenty of destructible objects, but not much else. 2/10

Atmosphere:
This is one of those block-based FPS games where after my session, no matter how I played, I felt like I had been at it for forever. Considering this one is about 30 minutes long, that's impressive. 1/10

Graphics:
Linework is nice, but shading is incredibly simple. Just simple pillow shading. Animation is all but ignored, since the characters are designed in such a way that animation is unnecessary. Oh, and the raycasting is often awkward with scenery objects moving in incredibly illogical ways. 4/10

Story:
I'm probably overthinking it, but there is some ambiguity in an otherwise ignored story. 2/10

Sound/Music:
Nothing objectionable, but none of it is very interesting or meaty. Which might be MAME, since I had to put my speakers at max to hear the game. 4/10

That's 28. On the high end, but I'm satisfied with where it ended up.

It's not really a mystery why this didn't take off. Even if you're just a semi-good light gun player, this isn't going to cost you much more than the $4 I would have spent to beat this. Another $4 to play the other paths and suddenly you've seen all there is to see. This just doesn't have a whole heck of a lot going for it, and judging by its rankings in arcade revenue at the time, most people felt the same way.

Instead, the reason to play it, today at least, is because this game is an incredible oddity. While it suffers from the same design philosophies that made the VOTOMS FPS awful a few years ago, it's still interesting. Mouse aiming almost like what we expect today, on an arcade system. It doesn't matter if it is good or not, what matters is that it did what it did. To give the game a lot of credit, we're still arguing about the Build Engine's implementation of mouse aiming, and that was one of the two engines responsible for bringing it together as we know it.

Duke Nukem (1991)

A variant of the title screen from a time when Apogee was worried about getting sued by the Captain Planet people.

Name:Duke Nukem AKA Duke Nukum
Number:229
Year:1991
Publisher:Apogee
Developer:Apogee
Genre:Side-Scrolling Shooter
Difficulty:3/5
Time:7 hours 25 minutes
Won:Yes (99W/73L)

Before I started Duke, I didn't understand or really care about his side-scrolling days. I didn't understand it compared to the other Apogee titles. Now, after having finished it, I understand it even if I do not necessarily think it's better than their later games. The events as they happened make sense. If Keen was first, then Duke is second, and while these might not necessarily be the best side-scrollers of the year, the ease of copying and the overall simple yet effective package went a long way towards eventually netting him that FPS.

Despite the seemingly disconnected nature of Duke's earlier titles, I can see the link. Duke is still the same tough as nails figure fighting against a typical menace, just played far less comically. Interactions are quite important, albeit more connected to what you can do to various powerups rather than interacting with scenery objects. It's just that it seems weird because of Duke's now forgotten backstory where he's the CIA's last resort against a robot threat, armed with a laser gun and a can-do attitude. Which is such a weird phrase, it sounds like something you would use to describe someone who isn't your typical action hero, not someone who looks like he can clench his jaw so hard his teeth shatter.

That's basically just the story of the game too. A guy named Doctor Proton had a lab accident and now has a metal plate in his head. He's going to take over the world with his army of robots, stop him. This, frankly, plays out very oddly, because it feels like the game wants to put more effort into the story, because you have fancy portraits for our hero and villain, and then in-level scenes where Proton mocks Duke for his shortcomings. Yet there just isn't much there, and the game just ends. It's strange.

A mostly full inventory, only lacking the various keys.

Gameplay then, is the clear focus. Duke has 8 points of health, plus one final hit before he dies. A firepower which indicates how many shots he can have on-screen, up to 4, not that you really need more than 3. The inventory is for keys, the computer board key, extra jump power, a robot hand/robohand which is technically a key, and a grappling hook. That last one allows Duke to climb on certain roofs, jump up to reach them, then down to get off.

Duke controls very well. Arrows move, ctrl jumps and alt shoots. Complaints are mostly minor, there is no height control in a jump, the walk sound isn't properly linked to Duke's walk cycle and Duke can't aim up or crouch. These are usually not problems, but they are nice things to have. Up really only activates things. F1 is the in-game menu, mostly for saving at between level corridors, which you return to if you die. Duke has infinite lives, so death is only a slap on the wrist. My two biggest complaints are of elevators, which are in some levels, which you can use to climb by pressing up. No down, just up, jump off for it to reset to the bottom. The other is that if Duke gets hit while using the grappling hook or in mid-air, will lose all upward momentum and drop like a stone.

Opposing him are about half typical enemies and half atypical enemies. You have your usual left/right walkers, along with ones that shoot. Not at you specifically, just randomly. Guys who walk on walls and that's it. In the more atypical department, we get guys who shoot at you while slowly gliding down. This subtle change is actually kind of tricky to avoid, usually their shots, but avoiding touching them too. Fortunately, touch in this case kills them. Then there are helicopters, they don't shoot at you, instead they hang above Duke and then move towards him, trying to ram him. This also makes them tricky to fight.

Finally, the last notable enemy was a mech. On regular terrain, these guys are simple to dodge. They shoot, jump up in a reverse U arc, then land in the direction you were in. As the game loves to have small platforms as it goes on, they can be tricky to fight. Assuming they don't get stuck against a low ceiling or in a place they can't drop down to you. The end objective is just to sort of exploit this.

Dr. Proton is the only boss fight, and he's the most disappointing guy in recent memory. (I only say recent because I can always forgot one) He has this egg-shaped floating machine, takes a shot at you, then goes down in a wide U shape, and repeats it at the other end. Very slowly. The only difference between episodes is that on later ones, he does his fight over more spikes than previous ones. It doesn't help him at all.
 

In general, enemies are not the primary threat to Duke. They cause some damage, but unless you get stuck against a horde with one or two shots, you'll probably be able to avoid most of it before finding another health item. Instead the threat once again is traps. Spikes, hidden and not, bombs hidden in shootable crates, bouncing mines and flame jets, among less obvious threats. The only two times I was worried about something was a conveyor belt which had spikes on it, and the occasion blind jump over an area I knew had spikes below.

Outside of this, levels were generally solid but unmemorable. Progress is usually swift, and exploration is usually rewarded by secrets. Often points, sometimes extra shots, usually getting four in an episode requires some secret hunting. The game was at it's worst when these two things were untrue. Usually a maze or some annoying gimmick which certainly changed things up, but not for the better. Oddly, the game was more annoying in the earlier episodes and not the later ones, as the earliest had the worst concentration of these.

Like I said, you can't just blindly shoot these things. Blue ones can sometimes contain balloons, which Duke can shoot to not get anything. Red meanwhile, has two items which increase your health, which are affected by shots. Soda cans shoot off into the sky when shot, removing the health point but giving points. (I have never gotten one, so it's a bit tricky) Chicken legs, meanwhile can be shot to turn them into a whole chicken, so it'll now give you two health points. Observation about this stuff can help on the trickier levels.

There's also a bit of environmental stuff you can mess around with. Destructible blocks fill the levels and because of how Duke aims, proper shooting of said blocks can allow access to optional areas. Occasionally, there are ACME signs, these fall after you walk under them. If you shoot them before they fall, you get points. Cameras, which Dr. Proton watches Duke through. Shoot all of them to get points.

It's these things that distinguish Duke from being a solid but otherwise unmemorable platformer. It may sound odd, but Duke and Proton don't feel like they have much character to them. Their interactions are phoned in. It lacks the charm Keen had, since it does still feel like the developers are trying to find their feet. There's no music, just PC Speaker sound effects, after having already released a game that allowed use of Adlib cards.

To the elephant in the room, the graphics. As I mentioned in the first entry, this game stole graphics from multiple other games. There's a lot of stuff that we don't know could be from other games, and some we can reasonably infer are original. Which is the problem with plagiarism, once you've started, we don't know when you've stopped, but we can usually guess that the really crappy ones are original work.
 

Even ignoring the plagiarism, everything that looks nice is usually tainted by some poor aspect. Backgrounds, the best-looking part of the game, usually has some part where it's clear that they just gave up on it at some point. Duke's animation is choppy and off-looking. Enemies are clearly designed around not having to animate them so much. There's not really a lot to the tileset. None of it is offensive, just visually uninteresting.

With that, let's get to the rating.

Weapons:
While the laser is very basic, I can't help but feel like the system of finding extra shots to have a decent firing rate to make it slightly interesting. 2/10

Enemies:
Half basic and half interesting, alas, dragged down by keeping the same variety over all three episodes and having one boss. 3/10

Non-Enemies:
None.

Levels:
Mostly fun but unmemorable. 5/10

Player Agency:
Missing a few key bits that should be there, but for the most part the game is designed so these aren't necessary. 7/10

Interactivity:
Destructible walls, but more importantly, a number of item interactions seldom seen in a platformer. 3/10

Atmosphere:
Fun enough, but feels like it doesn't have that distinct a character. 3/10

Graphics:
Even taking out the plagiarism, this has a lot of issues, but it's far from the worst game I've seen. 2/10

Story:
An afterthought, which is odd considering that they seem to want to put in effort here. 1/10

Sound/Music:
Simple PC Speaker, effective but boring. 2/10

That's 29, and checking my ratings for previous Apogee titles, that's just above what I gave Dark Ages. Key points seem to be that Dark Ages had good music, and more memorable level design even though I don't remember much of it. If anything, reading what I wrote about it makes it sound fairly typical of harder platformers of this era.

Despite liking this, and ultimately feeling it's worth a play, it is hard to come up with reasons beyond it's a solid game to play it. On the other hand, I have seen games recommended based on how easy it is to speedrun them, not any real good qualities, so Duke has that going for him. I didn't find any reviews unfortunately, owing to the game being overtaken by its more famous sequels.

Next time, we'll get back on track with some of 1992's final FPS games.

Duke Nukem: Won

"Duke the Fluke", okay, Proton needs to be taken down. I know the whole attempt to rule over humanity thing is something we should focus on, but these puns are crimes against humanity. This level is simple, but nicely laid out. Criss-crossing paths. I'm genuinely surprised at how merciful these levels are being...you know, when the game isn't some insane maze. This is basically just a straight, easy shot to the time machine and then...

The future. Gotta say, that background, despite being awful in at least one respect, is very nice. When I look at that, I think to myself yet, that is the future. This is a mostly typical Duke level at this point, lots of side stuff you don't need, fairly straight shot to the exit. The odd part is that the way forward is set up slightly strangely, at least in my head. You have to go back to a seemingly irrelevant computer board slot to advance. Seems like I never made the connection between the barriers those have and the ones that turn off. The nuclear reactors, which are more and more seeming like an afterthought, seemed more obvious in their connection to the barriers throughout the game.

Next up, remember that level where everything was an x shape? This is like that, except harder. There's only one way up, and naturally the game puts a lot so you have to keep climbing up. There are a lot of enemies, mostly mechs, and flame jets. That said, while the majority of the level is harder, the key is on the left side of the level and the way out is on the right, so assuming you're swift and avoid most of the fighting it's not that much more difficult.

This one changes up the formula, still a lot of platforms in an X shape, but this is confined to a smaller part of the level. I suppose it's better than another maze, but it feels just as lazy. There are a lot of mechs in this part, and when they're on small platforms it's hard to hit them without getting hurt. Moreso when you still don't have any additional shots. I got the jump boots now, but that's essential. I actually went through all of this level, at least as much as I could, twice, hoping to find another shot. There are some platforms I couldn't reach, which leads me to suspect the game placed the grappling hook in an earlier level as a secret.

I don't know how it got there, but that thing's stuck.

The next level ends my shot drought, as there's one right out in the open a little ways in. The level is set up in the same way as last time, so the mechs are in a position you can't easily defend against, yet it also does it in such a way to nullify the advantage they gain from this, and results in them jumping to the floor. There's also the easiest set of DUKE letters to collect, which is only possibly rendered less easy if you approach from below, which is one of those jump over a dangerous pit under a low ceiling bits.

Robohand time. Or is it Robot Hand? Guess the developers didn't decide on a proper name. This level is very easy, so much so that it feels odd on first playthrough. There's a slot for the computer card that you'll solve long before ever seeing the Robohand or it's slot or even knowing what the card was for. Otherwise this level is fairly typical, including making your ability to shoot the nuclear beam annoying by means of traps. Oh, and there's another shot out in the open, bringing me to 3.

"You have done well to survive this far, but what lies ahead may be your match!" I dunno man, this has been fairly easy so far. At least, until I see how green this area is. Yeugh. Quickly, one finds the grappling hook, assuming one doesn't die to the horde of traps placed on this level. Guess they remembered this was supposed to be the final episode. For a start, the game is suddenly taking advantage of the grappling hook's abilities, to advance you have to climb up one seemingly random ceiling hook. And this is where you'll be going a lot, because there are a lot of blind falls where you either fall back to the start, or onto traps. That's not getting into how the two key items are towards the end and the slots are closer to the beginning.

Having come out of the last level with only 1 health point, the next level was quite tense...until I got a full heal, anyway. This level uses the funneling thing the last one did, without all the danger that came with that one. The only real dangerous time I jumped down blindly was towards a bolt on the ground, which strikes me as incredibly cheap even for early Apogee. But by that point I had plenty of health, so it didn't really matter.

Now I'm in a lab, next to a locked door. Seems a strange and sudden choice, but I can roll with this. This level is almost a complete cakewalk, almost an apology for the last level. Except at the end there are the hidden spikes on a conveyor belt. I smell Broussard. Come to think of it, a lot of what I've said about level design in this game wouldn't be too out of place in the Tomb duology he did. Curiously, there's a slot for a computer card I just never found.

Surprise, you thought you were going to get to do things easy starting another level. No siree, falling down with some mines. I left the last level in bad shape, so this turned into something far more dangerous than it should be...unless you go all the way to the left, then you're fine. This level is weird. There's the same old funnel back to the start, which I did fall into once, but you can also just...ignore it and go to the way to the boss. The level isn't that generous with health, even if I did get two full heals. Oh, and the boss is basically the same as the one in the last episode, the arena is even basically the same.

And the game ends with Duke winning in vague terms. Guys, Arctic Adventure had more ending text than this, couldn't you have said something about a parade in his honor or something? I know this wasn't exactly an exciting story, but come on. Well, I'll think of something to say in the summary.

This Session: 2 hours 00 minutes

Total Time: 7 hours 25 minutes

Duke Nukem: Under Construction

Not with Duke's can-do attitude!

Right away, there's a slot for the Robohand and a green key door. The green door I can understand, but use of the Robohand seems relatively pointless since it isn't like you can get rid of it. There's a trick that I don't think the game actually says, where you can press up while hanging on something to climb up it. No going back down though. Once you get past that, it's simple, but annoying. Lots of platforms with hidden flame jets. This is Broussard's doing, I just know it. There's a roof you can hang from, and fun fact, if you get hit while hanging from something, you get knocked to the floor. Which is very high up if you're in this area. That's basically the level, outside of a fall where you get blown back and forth by fans. Naturally, there's a secret here. 

 The Bubble City of Dr. Proton. Which starts you off in a hole where when you climb up, enemies and hazards fall down. Despite knowing this, I got hit by them a lot, so either I suck at this game or this is really annoying. This makes itself clear that you will need a lot of keys early on, but said keys are not particularly forthcoming. I manage to find another computer card, guarded by flame jets, which doesn't help me yet. So, there's some trick I haven't noticed yet. And it turns out that the reason is that the computer card is used on a down arrow. That isn't annoying...

This level is big, so big there's just a massive amount you don't need to ever see. It's worth it just for the two health refills. What you actually have to go through is a sort of factory area, which isn't too tricky. What is tricky is a spot with two flame jets and a nuclear beam you have to take out. The only place you can shoot is right in front of the jets, and did you know that touching the beam is death? What was I expecting anyway? At this point the level is mostly typical, a few side areas, the usual go where indicated and gather up points.

Then Doctor Proton shows up, looking like Doctor Robotnik. He goes around in a U pattern, stand below it and jump up and shoot at him when he's waiting at the top, and he dies quickly enough.

What, nobody noticed Doctor Proton smoothing out the surface of the moon?

We get a weird little level outro, and then there's the usual speech. This won't stop him, I'll go after you. Also, moonbase, Duke really loves returning to moonbases. Onto Episode 2. The intro is the usual back and forth.

I see the north-eastern part of America and the British Isles have sunk into the sea.

To start with, this level is wide, expansive, fairly easy. Enemies approach in small numbers and traps are rare. Health items are so plentiful it's practically impossible to go anywhere without accidentally using one. I like it. There's a cleverly laid out secret near the start, if you notice that a hole near the start has a floor once you go past it, you can find an elevator which will allow you to reach some points and health.

The way this level is laid out does result in some slight issue. The top half is nice, lots of points items, tricky jumps and the one large group of enemies. Which makes it seem like the way out. The way out is, if you go there by slowly climbing down this area with a big pit, hidden. It's something that just looks like a hole to the bottom floor, which I already came up from without having noticed that there were more floors.

This level is weird, basically a series of Xs going on unto the top, sides and bottom. Carefully jump on individual blocks, with missing either resulting in a little progress lost or a lot of progress lost. It's an interesting concept, somewhat ruined by the keys basically just being at the bottom, then going through a series of doors on the sides. It's basically all but impossible to see the entire level because of this setup, but at least the way out is simple enough.

Find the Robohand says the level introduction text. Go up a giant elevator shaft, says the level. You better believe that the game is making the most of its verticality here. Only, it's a long ride up, then a long climb down. There are also certain points that funnel you back here, which isn't entirely annoying. There are two secrets attached to this shaft, one if you find your way back in from elsewhere, and another on the way up. One of the walls is destructible and has another blaster.

The actual level isn't much to talk about, just towers where you have to use elevators to climb up vaguely designed buildings. It's haphazard and annoying to go through, with the Robohand in some random room, and the eventual activation of it seeming just as random.

"You might find that the next level is too windy for you...!" What is that the three dots and then an exclaimation mark trying to convey? Waiting, then sudden surprise? Doesn't really work in a between level hint. There's no wind, just long jumps. So long they go off the screen, and then you go expecting another platform only to start free-falling. Outside of that big wide open area, there's another labyrinth. Interestingly, there's a section near the exit that technically requires a key to enter, but because the exit of this section is within normal jumping range, you can see the other side without having reached it first.

Another maze level. This one has the added bonus of having a conveyor belt full of mines. This is about all that's interesting about this level, it's another big maze, albeit one that's mostly straightforward once you know two tricks. The conveyor belt full of mines is optional, and you need to get the jump boots to win this one. After that, it's mostly going through the same passages hoping to eventually find the exit.

An ancient underground lunar city. Beware of the snake techbot. I don't know what it is, but I see another one of those segmented worm robots. Little late to warn me about that one, boys. Then again, I can't blame them, I don't have anything worth talking about in regards to this level.

The between level hint tells me to find the grappling hooks. This level is simple enough. It's set up like a construction site and makes decent use of the verticality of the game. Even if it is basically just up, down, up, down, up. If it weren't for the requirements of both the Robohand and the grappling hooks, this level would have been a lot better earlier, since outside of a part near the start where you can get blind-sided, it's a cakewalk. I don't know if I didn't notice this before, but the game has two backgrounds depending on where in the level you are. It's cool.

Mercury Mines, which is about the same as the last level. Dangerous start, then easy. In this case, you start at the bottom and your two choices of getting out involve going past a mine at the edge of a platform or past a moving flame on a small platform. That said, it has one element that's weird, the key is easy enough to find, but the door is quite tricky to reach.

Next level starts off with an elevator maze. Remember, elevators always return to the bottom the second you jump off, and it is somewhat slow going up them. Further, Duke starts going down the second he hits the ceiling. Unless it's a climbable one. But quickly it's out into a glorious open section. I stumble upon a door and start looking for a key. I find it, but not before Doctor Proton brags about how Duke will never escape his next maze. Great, I think...only that's the end of the level.

The final level of this episode. It's a conveyor belt maze. This is quite possibly the most tedious concept for a maze possible. Do one thing wrong and it's entirely possible you'll get sent back to the start. Take the wrong path, and you might end up wasting time only for points items. I don't even need useful items at this point, I have everything. But that's just the first part. The second part is more reasonable, just climb over the usual single block things in the sky. The trickiest part is a blind jump, you really just drop down, but you can't know that without failing first.

Doctor Proton is the exact same boss fight, only...actually the last one was over spikes. You're on a single block in the air, maybe? Whatever, I just kept blasting him and he died quicker than last time. No joke, the second I get on his level and start firing, he doesn't even get a real chance to defend himself. That's worse than the mechs throughout the regular level.

Doctor Proton is remarkably calm talking to someone who looks and sounds like he's going to slowly torture him to death.

There's another ending sequence where he goes from the moon back to Earth, where he shall go into the future to build up his robot army more. Because he had a time machine randomly placed, which I assumed was a joke, in a level in episode 1. Next time, Duke kicks Proton's ass for the third time. Will we see new enemies? Will Proton find a new way of attacking Duke? Will I learn to stop asking questions I already know the answer will be no?

This Session: 3 hours 00 minutes

Total Time: 5 hours 25 minutes

Duke Nukem: Introduction

I've never quite gotten Duke. Of all the side-scrolling characters to turn into a tough as nails FPS protagonist, Duke seemed like he was just sort of there. Outside of a kickass intro in his second game, and even that was just the novelty of animation, there wasn't anything that put him above Johnny Dash or Snake Logan. I'm pretty sure I only beat the shareware episode of Duke 2 simply because that's just what I had at the time. Because I remember despite some good stuff, my overall impression was that I played it because it passed the time. This is also the last Apogee game I haven't played until 1995. (well, outside of Wacky Wheels, but from Crystal Caves until Rise of the Triad, I've played everything for at least a little while)

That said, this is an important game because it's the first to have all the important Apogee guys together. That is, Allen H. Blum, George Broussard, Scott Miller, and Todd Replogle. John Carmack helped with the coding, which probably means that this is going to play a lot better than previous titles that were effectively in-house. This is still EGA, and there's only PC Speaker sound, compared to previous titles which were either CGA and PC Speaker or EGA with Adlib/Soundblaster options.

Before I go in, the only thing I've really heard about this one is the plagarism allegations. There was going to be a paragraph mentioning that this wasn't something to brag about. Duke isn't that good looking of a game, since it's EGA. But once I actually found the stuff it was pretty conclusively some of the only actually good-looking stuff in this...and some stuff from Mega Man's DOS spin-off. Those barrels are making me ask the question, is it possible to draw something so poorly that you can't copyright it?

Now, this is coming from a guy whose art is considered objectively awful, but it isn't that hard to draw a crate if you have any drawing ability whatsoever. Stealing stuff from Turrican I can understand, if you're stealing, you steal from the best. Not the dinky Mega Man game nobody likes. Straight-up ripping other game's artwork and then taking one from a crappy-looking game is like becoming a criminal mastermind to steal from a 7-11. It is a complete and utter waste of time. Enough distractions, let's get to the game.

As per usual for a shareware the story is in the instructions menu. The year is 1997, a man called Doctor Proton and his army of techbots have taken over Earth's largest city. Tokyo? No, Los Angeles. I'm assuming they mean largest in size rather than population, but even then Tokyo wins out. Even in the US, Houston is bigger. Unless there's some weird trick or the authors just did not care. I'm making fun of a game for calling LA the largest when the developers assumed that someone could field a robot army in 1997. Naturally, Proton's robots have easily overcome our planet's military, until...

"Self-proclaimed hero, Duke Nukum" is hired by the CIA to stop Proton. "Armed with his [prototype nuclear] pistol and his can-do attitude". Is this Duke Nukem or Lester the Unlikely? This feels less like the badass hero that he was in Duke Nukem 3D and more like the overconfident guy who gets killed in the opening scene before the real hero pops up. Considering how they know where Proton's lab is, since they're setting Duke on top of it, that might not be an unfair assessment. The controls are typical, left and right move, ctrl jumps and alt shoots. Up interacts with things and of course, esc is the menu.

Before the game starts, you get a little cutscene where Dr. Proton mocks Duke. Proton reminds me of the villain of Power Rangers: Time Force, but I guess wearing a metal plate on your face and having armor tends to look alike.

Duke looks like the antagonist's right-hand man, not a hero.

This is the second lamest insult I've heard recently, but I'll give Replogle and Co. credit and say that they intended this to be lame.

Starting off, Duke does feel considerably different to the character of previous Apogee games. Unlike past games, you drop down from a height to an area with both directions open to you. No going in one direction at the start like in Dark Ages. Although this uses a weird save system, only save in a hallway between levels. Unlimited lives, at least. Duke's "pistol" sticks out of the middle of his torso, meaning that it shoots slightly lower than him. Assuming that he's two tiles high, it seems as though we won't be overshooting anybody. Technically, it's at his top tile, but it hits anything that's shootable on his bottom tile too. That is, it ignores solid tiles, but not crates or destructible walls. Jumping is smooth, but has the issue of no real control over height. There are also elevators, which you can raise by pressing up. As soon as you jump off, they retract into the ground.

Duke makes itself quite different from other games by virtue of having a lot of weird power-ups. Firstly, you get on-shot onscreen, find more guns and you get more. There's a jumping power-up which increases jumping power. Then there are health items, chicken, soda, which you can shoot, and an atom. Duke loves his atomic references. Most health items are in crates, which come in three flavors, oddly, the gray variety is the most dangerous. That has dynamite in it, which explodes after a moment and hurts you. There are also letters which if collected in the order N U K E M (or possibly D U K E) gives you extra points. I wonder if that's the first case of that? Mind you, most games I can think of that did that were by Apogee or Epic.

Getting to this opening level, I completely understand how this game was so popular at the time. Between how smooth Duke is and how easy it is to move around this place, this game is showing a great start. Boiled down, it's three floors, plus a secret nearly as big as the level below. You get there by just jumping on a suspicious floor. The only thing truly dangerous is in the secret, which is counteracted by having a lot of health items. There's this mech I didn't get a good shot of, which takes a few blasts to kill and shoots back, compared to everything else here being dumb walk back and forth types. Sometimes on the floor, sometimes on the wall. There are also bouncing spiked metal mines which are invulnerable. They only disappear if they explode, which happens if you touch them. They have a short bounce range, but I didn't notice much trouble getting past them.

The way out is in the middle floor, find a key, open the door, then shoot a nuclear reactor. Or a glowing pillar of light representing a nuclear reactor. I'm sure if Duke was actually shooting the radioactive materials, the nuke part of his name would no longer be metaphorical. Ending the level leads to a corridor, which is the only place you can save. You also find out the various bonuses you got on that level.

Next level introduces some more mundane ranged enemies, and the mechs in regular areas. And boy howdy, does this shift up the difficulty. It's less the enemies and more the hazards. The non-mech is just a slow and dumb floating thing. There's also a walker with spinning flamethrowers you need to wait until the flame stops. It's less impressive than it sounds. The hazards are just dozens of spikes and ball mines, with the odd flame jet. It's not a big increase, but you could sleepwalk through the first level whereas you can realistically die on this level. So many spike balls and spikes in the ground. They try to hide the latter, but they're very easy to spot. It's very simple otherwise. two floors with an optional third floor leading to more points. Most of the level is, since the key is to Duke's left and the door out in down and to the left.

While levels are distinct, they aren't that important, as the game doesn't tell you how many there are or which one you're on. Level 3 starts with a helicopter attacking Duke. I must have killed it too quickly, or they just ram Duke. Which means it's just an oversized bird, really. Interestingly, it's another straight shot to the key out, just don't fall and go right. This also leads to a teleporter. Well, despite how easy it seems, I'll go explore the level. There are some fans around, which blow Duke away if he's within a certain distance, but if you shoot them, they stop.

What I sort of glossed over when reading the level introduction, there's one in the hallway between each level, is that I needed a computer card, which looks like a computer board. Oh, and four keys. This level is very non-linear, you can go in many ways to many different platforms. In this particular case, it's getting on my nerves. Perhaps 2D when the two dimensions are ZY instead of XY my brain can't navigate. I do know that I got lucky. After the fact, I discover that there's a secret level here. Sorry.

This next level is weird. Starting off there's a spinning fire thing and only one path, which eventually leads across a lightning barrier, you can see on the right. This game is actually throwing out a lot of jumps Duke can just barely make, but because of the engine they're all easily managable. I'm going to miss that about this game. Secondly, there's this flying centipede creature. Centipede in the sense that it has multiple segments. It's just an oddity, it makes a terrible racket but just goes in a fixed pattern.

I ended up skipping a big chunk of this by complete accident. Well, possibly a big chunk. There's a destructible floor which has two crates land on it, and one crate has dynamite and I jumped and made a big mistake. This nearly results in my death, because there's a mech on the ground below, but somehow I manage. There's no way back up, but the level does imply such a path with a series of blocks that you can now reach with some boots which increase your jumping power...sadly it's only a secret. There are also Energizer Bunny parodies roaming around. There are a lot of little jokes like that, despite how much more serious it appears to be, it's still spun from the same cloth as DN3D.

The boots and extra laser I picked up last level carry over, which is nice. This level's quite mundane at first, a fairly simple level which just has the illusion of non-linearity via tons of little side places. It does bring me into one of the game's few problems, no looking up or down. Every single jump down a pit is blind, which trips me up quite a few times. I found out those spiky balls are actually mines.

Back to this level, there's a moving car enemy, it doesn't seem to shoot at you, it's only faster than other enemies. The real enemy here is how freaking big and mazey this level has become. There is just so much of this level that's just wandering around trying to find a key. Looking at a map after the fact and it's just so big with little reason to it otherwise. It's just a maze, even in-universe Dr. Proton is trying to break Duke with it.

It's probably not that visible just standing here, but this is very annoying to see in motion. Gray against a gray background. Probably not helped my a headache I have as I write this. (Unrelated reasons) It does look nice, but Keen or Dangerous Dave this is not. This continues to be more about navigating around hazards than fighting, well, much of anything. This level is not quite as ponderous as the last one, instead centering around a tall elevator shaft.

And these stylish rockets you can shoot to spawn a blue crate.

There are two new elements, introduced soon after one another. The Robohand, which is basically another type of key. The difference is it seems to be used for non-door objects, and if you use the slot without having the Robohand, you get hurt. That little trick nearly cost me a restart. Conveyor belts, which function exactly as you'd think they would.

Is that water? A reflection? Or is that a glitch? Could go either way, since it's flickery as hell in gameplay, but there are a lot of them. This is another mazey level, but in comparison to the one a few levels ago, this is much better done, more straightforward, and you only need two things. The key out and a grappling hook that seems to be claw hands. On certain ceilings, Duke can navigate across them. How bizarre. There's not really much else about this level, it tries to do a trick where you have to go back to the start if you fall down to the bottom level, which is really easy to avoid.

Here, you start off next to some walking enemies. Not sure how I feel about this one. Sure, you have to be quick, but you also start in the hallway beforehand. It's a sign of how this level rolls, it tries to make enemies the real threat...by spamming a lot of them. It kind of worked, but that was just because they were in-between crates which often contained dynamite. I'm starting to loathe those gray containers. At least the level is nicely designed.

Another addition, moving fires. Duke can't shoot them. After all, he is shooting an atomic weapon, and aren't fires just mini suns? (Considering this game's fascination with the atom, that may not be untrue) This had a weird effect on my handling of the level, I could try to go past the sections with them, but I already have the key and found the exit. That's not really something that speaks favorably towards how I'm thinking of these levels. They're good, but in the short and sweet way. I think outside of the first level I wouldn't consider any of these classics, and that's more because I think the first deals with the assumption a lot would have in these days that you go from left to right mindlessly. Like Metroid's first section.

I would have preferred to have dealt with this on an episodic basis, but time got away from me this week. I'll try to cover til the end of episode 2 next week.

This Session: 2 hours 25 minutes