Duke Nukem: Won

"Duke the Fluke", okay, Proton needs to be taken down. I know the whole attempt to rule over humanity thing is something we should focus on, but these puns are crimes against humanity. This level is simple, but nicely laid out. Criss-crossing paths. I'm genuinely surprised at how merciful these levels are being...you know, when the game isn't some insane maze. This is basically just a straight, easy shot to the time machine and then...

The future. Gotta say, that background, despite being awful in at least one respect, is very nice. When I look at that, I think to myself yet, that is the future. This is a mostly typical Duke level at this point, lots of side stuff you don't need, fairly straight shot to the exit. The odd part is that the way forward is set up slightly strangely, at least in my head. You have to go back to a seemingly irrelevant computer board slot to advance. Seems like I never made the connection between the barriers those have and the ones that turn off. The nuclear reactors, which are more and more seeming like an afterthought, seemed more obvious in their connection to the barriers throughout the game.

Next up, remember that level where everything was an x shape? This is like that, except harder. There's only one way up, and naturally the game puts a lot so you have to keep climbing up. There are a lot of enemies, mostly mechs, and flame jets. That said, while the majority of the level is harder, the key is on the left side of the level and the way out is on the right, so assuming you're swift and avoid most of the fighting it's not that much more difficult.

This one changes up the formula, still a lot of platforms in an X shape, but this is confined to a smaller part of the level. I suppose it's better than another maze, but it feels just as lazy. There are a lot of mechs in this part, and when they're on small platforms it's hard to hit them without getting hurt. Moreso when you still don't have any additional shots. I got the jump boots now, but that's essential. I actually went through all of this level, at least as much as I could, twice, hoping to find another shot. There are some platforms I couldn't reach, which leads me to suspect the game placed the grappling hook in an earlier level as a secret.

I don't know how it got there, but that thing's stuck.

The next level ends my shot drought, as there's one right out in the open a little ways in. The level is set up in the same way as last time, so the mechs are in a position you can't easily defend against, yet it also does it in such a way to nullify the advantage they gain from this, and results in them jumping to the floor. There's also the easiest set of DUKE letters to collect, which is only possibly rendered less easy if you approach from below, which is one of those jump over a dangerous pit under a low ceiling bits.

Robohand time. Or is it Robot Hand? Guess the developers didn't decide on a proper name. This level is very easy, so much so that it feels odd on first playthrough. There's a slot for the computer card that you'll solve long before ever seeing the Robohand or it's slot or even knowing what the card was for. Otherwise this level is fairly typical, including making your ability to shoot the nuclear beam annoying by means of traps. Oh, and there's another shot out in the open, bringing me to 3.

"You have done well to survive this far, but what lies ahead may be your match!" I dunno man, this has been fairly easy so far. At least, until I see how green this area is. Yeugh. Quickly, one finds the grappling hook, assuming one doesn't die to the horde of traps placed on this level. Guess they remembered this was supposed to be the final episode. For a start, the game is suddenly taking advantage of the grappling hook's abilities, to advance you have to climb up one seemingly random ceiling hook. And this is where you'll be going a lot, because there are a lot of blind falls where you either fall back to the start, or onto traps. That's not getting into how the two key items are towards the end and the slots are closer to the beginning.

Having come out of the last level with only 1 health point, the next level was quite tense...until I got a full heal, anyway. This level uses the funneling thing the last one did, without all the danger that came with that one. The only real dangerous time I jumped down blindly was towards a bolt on the ground, which strikes me as incredibly cheap even for early Apogee. But by that point I had plenty of health, so it didn't really matter.

Now I'm in a lab, next to a locked door. Seems a strange and sudden choice, but I can roll with this. This level is almost a complete cakewalk, almost an apology for the last level. Except at the end there are the hidden spikes on a conveyor belt. I smell Broussard. Come to think of it, a lot of what I've said about level design in this game wouldn't be too out of place in the Tomb duology he did. Curiously, there's a slot for a computer card I just never found.

Surprise, you thought you were going to get to do things easy starting another level. No siree, falling down with some mines. I left the last level in bad shape, so this turned into something far more dangerous than it should be...unless you go all the way to the left, then you're fine. This level is weird. There's the same old funnel back to the start, which I did fall into once, but you can also just...ignore it and go to the way to the boss. The level isn't that generous with health, even if I did get two full heals. Oh, and the boss is basically the same as the one in the last episode, the arena is even basically the same.

And the game ends with Duke winning in vague terms. Guys, Arctic Adventure had more ending text than this, couldn't you have said something about a parade in his honor or something? I know this wasn't exactly an exciting story, but come on. Well, I'll think of something to say in the summary.

This Session: 2 hours 00 minutes

Total Time: 7 hours 25 minutes